The Biggest Challenge

One great way to grow your esteem for others is to realize that their challenges might be very different from yours. What’s simple for you to do might require great effort on their part and vice-versa. If you change your mindset and focus from your own experience to a non-prejudiced view of other people, you will be able to see into what it means to them to do what they are doing, say what they are saying, act like they are acting. If you want to build otheresteem in this way, take the opportunity to call it like you see it.

Openly recognize effort in others. See the path they are on, not only the results they are reaping.

People might be suprised at your insights and feel valued in a different way when you begin to share with them what you see. It is the biggest challenge of all to get over ourselves just enough to see the others clearly, to imagine what things are like from their experience, to display empathy and practice appreciation in this way. Remember this practice is not about pretending to be interested in the other, it is about building your own ability to value people.  Look closer, listen deeper, revisit your preconceived notions and you might find you like finding what the biggest challenge may be for that particular person. Try it, and see where it leads you!

Reblog this post [with Zemanta]
Share
  • http://www.NorthForkCSL.org @DrJackKing

    Monica, your post reminds me of a Sioux prayer that captures the pure essence of what it is like to value others, to hold them in high esteem:

    “As quietly as little rabbit’s feet, the morning glory sun arrives to greet the Red Man as he worships in his way. For this he asks the Spirit every day: Before I judge my friend, O let me wear His moccasins for two long weeks, and share the path that he would take in wearing them. Then, I shall understand and not condemn.”

    Mother Teresa, speaking of the Peace necessary for us to be One, essentially taught the same lesson: “If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.” Herein, for me, is the essence of OtherEsteem—we belong to one another. We are family and we share Love just as assuredly as we share the Breath of Life. I, for one, thank my lucky stars we belong to one another, and that we are blessed to share the path set before us with others who understand—or, who want to understand.

    Thank you for an edifying, inspirational post dear friend. Hugs!

  • Pingback: Tweets that mention The Biggest Challenge | The Otheresteem Blog -- Topsy.com

  • Pingback: The Serving Nature of OtherEsteem « The Founding Spirit

  • Zoe aka QuirkyTraveller

    Ah – it worked that time!

    Your writing is so inspiring and in the true spirit of generosity. I so agree with wise DJK that belonging to each other is so important. A couple of quotes that resonate following this:

    “I have found that among its other benefits, giving liberates the soul of the giver” Maya Angelou

    “No one has ever become poor by giving” – Anne Frank

    Looking forward to more connections via Twitter
    Zoë x

  • http://thepeopleskillscoach.com Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

    Hi Monica,
    I was very moved by your post about learning to value others because in this difficult economic time some people are “pushing” only for results. I am a driver type and very results oriented yet have learned, as you say, the value in patience and learning about others.
    Yesterday I had a networking breakfast with a consultant and his spouse who runs their business. They wanted to brainstorm new ideas. His specialty is getting others to think innovately. So I went with great hopes and anticipation.
    Unfortunately, he does not listen! He labeled most of my brainstorming as non-action oriented. They both finally said that they are in full sales mode and were going full force.

    I mused to myself later on about their logic error — listening and action are not mutually exclusive. When you listen and see potential it leads to some of the most productive action.

    I put a short 2 minute motivator video up on my site — Transitions the Easier Way. As I was creating it I had both thoughts clearly in mind: Exploring connections with other people and taking action to change your life/career.

    Your blog post is a winner. It is clear, compact, and very well written.

    Many thanks for your contribution to this global discussion on valuing others. Would love to connect with you on Twitter and I will RT your post.
    Kate Nasser, The People-Skills Coach

  • Pingback: The Serving Nature of OtherEsteem « NorthFork

  • Pingback: MAPping Company Success